Living with Autism

First published January 2008
Updated to include the thought - Bratty is TEN next week!!!


Two good friends have asked me the same question recently;

"What are you going to do with Bratty, when she grows up?

This is because Bratty is the more severe of my two children and at the moment, the more challenging. But it was also because these friends both have girls, who are growing up.

Girls, because of their biology, approach puberty sooner and in a more obvious way. So as a mother of a girl, you have to take on another level of self care and self management. Something new to cope with.

Boys are a bit easier! Okay, they get a bit tackle happy but that happens with typical boys too, and I have to say, from the age of about 3 months (when they can find it) until, at the last check; 45 years (and counting) that doesn't change.
All that changes is where and when they decide to play pocket billiards, a simple case of "choose your environment." Or in my brother-in-law's words; &q…

I am reading and empathising with yet another new diagnosis at the moment.
As hard as things are for me now; it was much worse then.

Can you remember the clothes issues? When they would fight with you to take off their shoes; coat, pants and Nappy? We used to put Boo in dungarees, with the difficult clasps, sometimes with a t-shirt over the top, to ensure that he couldn't take off his nappy.

How about wearing a seat belt or buggy harness?

I remember the first time Boo got out of a buggy harness and landed on the floor of a shop where I was buying milk. I was mortified. How could this happen with a 14 month old?
How could I let this happen to my baba?

Before his sister was born; I had this plan to get a fabulous Italian buggy with a sort of standing step at the back for him to ride on while she had the seat. Mamas and Papas still do this model; "The Pliko".
When she arrived and I made the first attempt to go out; I ended up using the pouch to carry Bratty because Boo was not s…

With thanks to K-line for the gift of the phrase and the gift of her astute and intuitive comments.

And Sister Wolf for the gift of the website and well, for being Sister Wolf.

oh, and consider this a copyright!

xx

PS: if you think that neural otherness is awesome and want to help a student with her thesis on positive attitudes to raising kids with autism - please email affinityautismireland@gmail.com for a survey.

This is the walking path below the Glen of the Downs Hotel in Co Wicklow.
Two more deer had passed before Boo got in the way of this one.

Lately there has been a lot of negative media about autism as a certain group seek to convince the world that someone or something is to "blame" for autism, outside simple apple/tree genetics.

There was an awful recent blog where a woman sought to express her "devastation" that her daughter would never play with Barbies or come and try on clothes in The Gap for fun (or something) because the kid has Aspergers and was more concerned with computers than a plastic anatomically impossible female stereotyping doll. The New York Times also did a bit on a similar theme.
I don't want to engage the haters - I would rather continue on blithely celebrating my kid's diversity and achievements, which are all the greater for the work that goes into getting us there.

Yep, we have the down days. And it is okay to vent a little amongst friends, it is a healthy way to burn up stress and get focused again.

But getting stuck in the phase of wanting to wipe your child's autism …